On August 4, Cornwall, England celebrates the Feast Day of Saint Sithney, the patron saint of mad dogs.
Legend has it that the Lord Almighty asked good ol’ Sithney if he would be the patron saint of girls seeking husbands. Sithney politely declined the offer, fearing he would be besieged with prayers for rich hubbies and fancy jewelry and the whatnot. Instead, Sithney said he’d rather be the patron saint of something like mad dogs, and the request was granted.
August 4 is also the birthday of U.S. President Barack Obama. We know when he was born, but where exactly where he was born is at present a topic of heated debate, dominating the media coverage on conservative talk shows. It may be that one day a child will review the historical archives of August 2009 and be surprised that the question of Obama’s citizenship even existed, let alone monopolized the news cycle, between the death of Michael Jackson and the devastation of Hurricane Grace. But until that day, we wish the President good luck in his quest to prove he’s American, and we ask Sithney to hasten his healing efforts on certain unnamed talk show hosts.